"Yeah, I guess," he says heavily, sitting still now, thinking about where along his horn her hands might be and then realising that he's focusing on them, the knowledge that her hands are somewhere on him and that he can't feel exactly where, on that possibility of touch. He sighs, quietly this time. Rolls his shoulders a little bit, rolls his ankle. Focuses on that.
"I've just got to be careful next time. Maybe take a break for a little while. But not uh, the kind of break that's going to get in the way of that job for you, though. It's just dumb personal crap, not going to effect the important stuff. You're still going to get our best, ma'am."
She smiles slightly to herself at that, that he's still thinking of her, of the care he's willing to put in even though Vivienne knows the job is fake. Though really the world will be better with that noble taken down.
"It would be nice to hope that you have more of an option than being careful or taking a break." Though with how he's let her in, let her work and opened up this hasn't been a wasted time.
"You need something. A need started this, perhaps a different one to what you expected. You should be able to ask for it. If it'll help."
"Uh--" The sound comes out of him all on its own, surprised, less than steady. He stares at the room in front of him, the line of his shoulders tight, his mouth open, ready to say-- say what? She doesn't understand. Because she's not Qunari. Which is the kind of thing he has to make sure he remembers from now on. Right. He takes a deep breath, surprised at how hard his heart is beating, and lets it out slowly.
"It, uh," he starts. "I appreciate the thought, ma'am, but it's... I know it's something we joke about, but I can't expect you to, ah--" No, she'll take that as an insult, right? Saying she couldn't do it, pricking her pride. Hard to tell right now. Better rephrase. "There's a lot of stuff the tamassrans train for that I'm not going to be able to explain, and I can't put that on you. Even this is kind of, uh-- I appreciate it, though. Nice of you to offer."
Breathe. In, out. Don't move your head, makes it easier not to think about the contact. Look at the fancy furniture, notice the smell of the stuff Vivienne's using without thinking too hard about it. Things will feel more normal once he's outside with the Chargers again, and a little more normal after that. This isn't as big a deal as it feels like right now. All he has to do is wait, and he'll be able to see that. Asit tal-eb. Right.
Just as she doesn't expect him to let her in, proud as she is as to how much they've talked, that he's gotten some of it off his chest -- or head, she also doesn't have an expectation for what could happen. Okay, that second part might be a lie, she's certainly had to consider avenues of what he might need if only to try and think ahead. But she also knows that he's right when he says that there's more than she could ever know.
"If what you need is something you can't ask for then simply know that the people around you will do what they can to make sure your head is where it needs to be. We may not know what to do best... but pride too often can doom us."
And as someone who wears pride central in her mask... At the very least this has pulled some curiosity in her. After all, even if none of them are trained, even if no one can truly perform what is needed, shouldn't someone at least have the knowledge of how to help someone?
"It's not a pride thing, it's..." He trails off, trying to find a way to make sure she gets it that's not going to make him explain. He doesn't find it, and more explaining's the only thing left if he doesn't want to insult her, and he lets out something that's more a frustrated noise than a sigh and rubs his hands over his thighs again.
"It's like this, ma'am. If I'm going to... let go. There's got to be someone nearby who knows what needs to get done. Stupid, to think someone's going to know that just because they're good at taking charge. That's not the kind of mistake I'm going to make twice. It isn't personal, it's just better for both of us if I just don't. Sorry."
Which is the point where he should maybe stand up, thank her, leave, or maybe just start smalltalking his way toward a way to go that's not abrupt enough to insult her. But a moment passes, and then another one, and he keeps sitting here, her hands still on him somewhere, not getting up. Well. Better to let her set the pace anyway. That's always the right way with Vivienne. Better just to keep sitting here for a while.
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"I've just got to be careful next time. Maybe take a break for a little while. But not uh, the kind of break that's going to get in the way of that job for you, though. It's just dumb personal crap, not going to effect the important stuff. You're still going to get our best, ma'am."
no subject
"It would be nice to hope that you have more of an option than being careful or taking a break." Though with how he's let her in, let her work and opened up this hasn't been a wasted time.
"You need something. A need started this, perhaps a different one to what you expected. You should be able to ask for it. If it'll help."
no subject
"It, uh," he starts. "I appreciate the thought, ma'am, but it's... I know it's something we joke about, but I can't expect you to, ah--" No, she'll take that as an insult, right? Saying she couldn't do it, pricking her pride. Hard to tell right now. Better rephrase. "There's a lot of stuff the tamassrans train for that I'm not going to be able to explain, and I can't put that on you. Even this is kind of, uh-- I appreciate it, though. Nice of you to offer."
Breathe. In, out. Don't move your head, makes it easier not to think about the contact. Look at the fancy furniture, notice the smell of the stuff Vivienne's using without thinking too hard about it. Things will feel more normal once he's outside with the Chargers again, and a little more normal after that. This isn't as big a deal as it feels like right now. All he has to do is wait, and he'll be able to see that. Asit tal-eb. Right.
no subject
Just as she doesn't expect him to let her in, proud as she is as to how much they've talked, that he's gotten some of it off his chest -- or head, she also doesn't have an expectation for what could happen. Okay, that second part might be a lie, she's certainly had to consider avenues of what he might need if only to try and think ahead. But she also knows that he's right when he says that there's more than she could ever know.
"If what you need is something you can't ask for then simply know that the people around you will do what they can to make sure your head is where it needs to be. We may not know what to do best... but pride too often can doom us."
And as someone who wears pride central in her mask... At the very least this has pulled some curiosity in her. After all, even if none of them are trained, even if no one can truly perform what is needed, shouldn't someone at least have the knowledge of how to help someone?
no subject
"It's like this, ma'am. If I'm going to... let go. There's got to be someone nearby who knows what needs to get done. Stupid, to think someone's going to know that just because they're good at taking charge. That's not the kind of mistake I'm going to make twice. It isn't personal, it's just better for both of us if I just don't. Sorry."
Which is the point where he should maybe stand up, thank her, leave, or maybe just start smalltalking his way toward a way to go that's not abrupt enough to insult her. But a moment passes, and then another one, and he keeps sitting here, her hands still on him somewhere, not getting up. Well. Better to let her set the pace anyway. That's always the right way with Vivienne. Better just to keep sitting here for a while.